Practicing (Spock)

[pippacarlyle]

It was just around noon and the ship was nearly completely empty. Pippa couldn't remember the Enterprise ever looking quite this deserted. She knew that she should not be inside either, that she should join the rest of the crew in their frolicking out doors, but she couldn't find any reason to go outside, she didn't have any family here anymore and she was pretty sure she still wasn't old enough to be allowed into the local bar. It was the first beautiful day in a week and Pippa decided to spend it hiding out in officers lounge. But it wasn't a complete waste, Pippa was standing, feet shoulder's width apart with her right hand held out in front of her and her eyes squeezed tight. She would have looked rather ridiculous if someone would have walked by, but no one did.

She had no idea how it worked really, her powers. She had figured out long ago that as long as she was calm she had some control over it, but stay calm was not nearly as easy as it looked. But right now she was fine, there was no one around to make her angry and nothing to do all day. This was one of the few times she had really stopped to practice using her powers since before she attended Starfleet Academy. Back before her mother died she had fairly average control. She was a happy, mellow, little girl and it wasn't difficult to stay calm. Pippa could recall picking the pocket of a well dressed tourist from one hundred feet away, a hundred dollar bill had flown right out of his pocket and right into Pippa's hand. That was back when Pippa had two functional hands, she often wondered if the loss of use in her left hand had taken away part of her control.

She was focusing on an empty cardboard box which she had placed in the middle of the room. She tried to expunge every other thought from her mind and focus on the box, the shape, the size, the color, the texture. Everything about the box she had memorized. She then pictured the box flying slowly upwards. She held the image of the box in the air in her head for a few moments before risking opening one eye. There, just as she had imagined it, was the box, suspended in mid air as if by invisible strings.
"Yes!" Pippa exclaimed, a wide smile streching across her face. She could nearly jump for joy, but before she could react the box dropped, she had lost focus for too long.
"No!" She kicked the box, "Stupid, irritating, incorporative, badly made, curse upon humanity..." She continued rolling off insults at the box under her breath nearly forgetting why exactly she was there in the first place.

[arc]

Spock, after having decided that spending time alone in his quarters was doing him no good, began to make his way towards the Officers Lounge. Being cooped up all day in one room and having to deal with so many thoughts and emotions was only making matters worse. Perhaps if he spent some time in the presence of other people (whether he chose to visit with them or not) would be a good thing. It wasn't a long ways from his quarters to the lounge, but it was far enough to give Spock some time to think things over.

Last night had been a disaster; he hadn't gotten any sleep. Being half-Vulcan, sleep wasn't as necessary to him as it was to humans, but a sleepless night still took its toll. Spock had made the most difficult decision of his life last night, and it had all ended badly. He had walked away from the person he loved the most, probably forever, leaving her heart-broken. She most likely didn't even realize that Spock was just as depressed as she was. She would never come to that realization . . . And now, Spock was all alone, with no one to turn to – with no one to be there for him. But he kept telling himself that it was better this way. He wouldn't be holding her down any longer. She would never have to worry about him again. It was just too hard for Spock to express his emotions, and Uhura deserved to love someone who could give her emotions in return for her own. She deserved someone that Spock could never be.

All day Spock had sat in his quarters, trying to decide if he had made the right choice by letting her go. Logic said yes. His heart said no. But which should he follow? His Vulcan side, or his human one? All of his life, Spock had been taught to discard emotions, to forget them completely and let logic rule his thoughts. But now, a part of him wanted to forget the Vulcan way. Vulcan was dead, forever lost. Why should he continue to purge his emotions? What was the point? Uhura wanted him to express himself, but he couldn't. That was why he had pushed her away.

But Spock was sick of thinking about it, and so he had made the decision to visit the Officers Lounge. After what seemed like an eternity of walking down that long, dark hallway, Spock finally reached his destination – the door to the lounge. Outside, he hesitated, thinking to go back to his quarters and lay down again, but he shook his head, pushing that thought away. He could allow himself to become an emotional wreck. That . . . wasn't logical.

“No! Stupid, irritating, uncooperative, badly made, curse upon humanity . . .”

So, someone else had decided to spend time in the lounge today. Spock couldn't suppress a smirk. Obviously, this person was overly upset about something or other. The Vulcan Commander drew his pass card, using it to open the door. Only officers were allowed to enter this room – the captain made sure of that. Once the door had opened, Spock took a step inside to see who occupied the room. It was a lone woman, standing in a very odd position, yelling at a box. What a sight.

Spock coughed gently to catch her attention, preferring not to say anything lest he startle her. He could have just walked right past her and sat down, but he decided not to. Spock was in a bad mood, but that didn't mean he should inflict it upon others. And Spock wasn't familiar with this person. He didn't want to give her a bad impression. Most of the crew members hated him already anyways . . .

[pippacarlyle]

The box did a quick flip against Pippa's will, caused by her frustration and then dropped again. It was not possible, it seemed, for her to keep calm long enough for the object she was trying to control to bend to her will. It was amazingly frustrating to be granted one single gift in life, if that was what this was, and not be able to have any control over it. She couldn't stand it, and it made her wish sometimes she did not have it at all. Couldn't she trade this for something easier to control? Something that didn't depend on her being calm. It wasn't difficult to think of an entire list of powers she might have preferred. She could have been a Betazed and read minds or whatever they did. Pippa wold have preferred anything over this. But in the end it came down to the fact that this was the power she had, the one she couldn't get rid of or control.

She knew she would have this power for her entire life, and that if she didn't learn how to control it it would ruin her life. But she knew it was possible it do as she had done it before. What was it that had changed her so much that she could no longer stay calm? She knew very well what it was but she would die long before she admitted it, even to herself.

Pippa never had really been sure why she had this odd power, her mother had not had it, nor any of the other family members she knew of. The only thing she could think of was that it came from her father's side of the family, which could only mean that she was half human. She often pondered exactly what the other half of her may be, she wished she asked her mother but as a child it never occurred to her that she must have a father out there somewhere. Now, she was sure that the only way she would find control over what ever this weird ability was was to find her father. Maybe he could teach her, but the constant question in her mind lately was would he even want her? If he had cared about her or her mother wouldn't he have stayed with them?

Pippa was so lost in her thoughts that she didn't hear the footprints of Commander Spock approaching behind her. She flushed with embarrassment when she heard him cough as she realized that she must have looked incredibly stupid. The box jumped into the air and spun a bit as if mocking her. She turned around slowly not entirely sure what to say. She had been talking to a box for what must have seemed like no apparent reason.
"Um... I, the box... It wouldn't... uh... move." She sighed, there really was no quick explanation.

[arc]

The box wouldn't move? Could she manipulate objects? Obviously, if Spock had just seen a box move by itself. Well, not really by itself, he supposed. He had heard of it before – manipulating objects. But he had never witnessed it. It was all very . . . fascinating to him. The girl's explanation was rather amusing, but Spock suppressed a smile, deciding it best not to anger her. Besides, he didn't even know her. Spock didn't know anyone on this ship, really. He knew Kirk, Uhura, and a few other select people, but that was all. His other relationships had been strictly business, nothing more. It still struck him as odd, however, that he didn't even know the girl's name. Spock had thought that he knew the names of everyone, since it was usually he who was in charge of keeping track of the crew members. This person's name had alluded him.

“What are you doing here?” It was a simple question – the only question that Spock could think to ask without offending her. She was obviously here to . . . well, practice manipulating boxes, or whatever she was doing. It was foolish of him to ask it, and the question came off as rather harsh. Unintentionally, of course. After all, she could probably ask him the same question. Why had he come here in the first place? It seemed like a waste of time now. He should have just stayed in his quarters and thought things over. But Spock's human instincts just had to kick in, and now here he was, standing in the middle of the Officer's Lounge with a girl he hadn't even met.

But maybe, by coming here, Spock could learn something knew. He'd read about manipulation, but never witnessed it or heard about it from someone who actually experienced it. It would be something new to learn about, and Spock had always craved knowledge. Perhaps this wasn't a complete waste of time.

{Ack! Short, sorry. Low on muse...}